To the Middle Aged Man...

I am having a very lazy time in Jackson, WY. For the record (and I might have already blogged this before so bare with me), the area is "Jackson Hole," the town itself is Jackson, so if you're confused, now you know! Also, if you want a laugh, go to Jackson Hole's official website because the first frequently asked question is "Where's the hole?"

I went to the website for you. You're welcome

 Now, part of the reason I'm having a lazy time is because there isn't a lot to do here if you're by yourself. Things are sort of expensive and I don't feel like spending the money to go out alone. Also, hiking by oneself, while pretty, isn't as much fun as going with someone else.

I started off yesterday with some yoga. It was expensive because you can get away with that type of stuff in a resort town but I enjoyed it and that's what matters.

This is where the elk would be if they were here.

After that, I walked over to the National Elk Refuge. I said in my last blog post that reports of actual elk had been varied but I'm sad to report that there weren't any elk. I think the thing people forget (I am not one of these people, I'd just been hopeful) is that these are wild animals and not zoo creatures. They migrate to the elk refuge for the winter, they don't just chill there because you're here for the weekend. Every week, there are new reports of people getting mauled by wild animals while they're trying to take selfies because everyone in the world has forgotten that these are real animals and not toys. I did get to see where the elk would be if they were here though and that was nice!

After that, I mostly hung out for the rest of the day. I did some walking around, but like I said before, there isn't too much to do by yourself here!

I did have to deal with my new middle aged roommate however. This hostel has the strangest assortment of guests I've ever seen. I've mainly seen families entering and exiting -- like 16 relatives got together and just rented a load of dorms, it's weird. As is staying in a dorm with a man who has white hair and no social graces... When I got home from town at noon yesterday, I expected to have a few hours to myself since the semi-cute guy who took fourth months off from work to do a solo roadtrip was checking out and check in wasn't until 3pm, but nope, this man is here. He had the door wide open too, which made me uncomfortable, because all of my stuff is in here. I sat back down on my bunk and watched him unpack some things while internally hoping that he would leave soon because I wanted to shower. Leave he did, but he left something behind. To my middle aged dorm mate, when you exit the shower, please take your underwear with you! He's left them on a clothes hanger in the shower! What?! So much no. All the no.

My saga with him continued later on (after I'd gingerly removed his undergarments from the shower and put them on a hanger in the room so I could clean myself). At 9:30pm, I had planned to Skype one of my favorite people, Mr. Ryan Lind. We haven't talked in a while, so I was really looking forward to it. Mr. Roommate had been out all day but comes back in around 9pm and after being rude and surly towards our third roommate, climbs into his bunk above mine. 9:30 rolls around and Ryan calls. I'm being quiet during my call and there aren't any rules that say I can't talk in the dorm, but two minutes into my call, he sticks his nose over the edge of the bunk and says "Are you going to be doing that much longer? This is a bedroom and beds are for sleeping." Yeah, well, showers are for showering and you didn't have a problem leaving your tighty whities in there, now did ya?! The third roommate then chimes in that he hopes he doesn't wake us with his 6am alarm and this guy says "No, that won't be a problem because that's when people are supposed to be awake." *Flash forward to this morning when he was the last person to get up.* He then tells me "You can go to the common room and talk all you want." Oh, I'm sorry, you mean the common room that requires me to walk OUTSIDE in the DARK? No, thank you. He then climbs down from his tower and shuts off the lights without another word to anyone (roommate #3 was still doing things!). I've stayed at quite a few hostels and while most of them have quiet hours, those hours don't typically start until 10 or 11pm. If you'd like the luxury of a private room, then go get one. Also, yes, I appreciate that I should be respectful of my roommates as well but I was trying at the very least, unlike this man who is way to old to be staying in a dorm.

Ryan and I then embarked in an elaborate Skype conversation that involved a lot of typing and mime work on my part (did I type as loudly as possible? Absolutely).

Today, I've been chilling some more. I watched last night's episode of Empire. Can I say that I really hate having to wait a whole week in between episodes? Because I do. Ryan and I are planning on Skyping again later today when we can actually talk to each other and Mr. Roommate is in the process of checking out now!

Also I am staying in Helena for a few nights next week and decided to try my luck with Couchsurfing BUT I wanted a backup plan, so I booked myself a hotel room before the rates went up as I got closer, and fifteen minutes after I made my reservation, I got a reply from Couchsurfing! Don't worry about the hotel room, I can cancel any time between now and next Sunday without an issue and I'm going to keep it until I'm 200% positive that things are squared away but it's funny how these things work out some times.

Idaho Potatoes and The Scorch Trials

I returned to Wyoming today, but not before getting some Idaho potatoes for lunch. I was going to go to a restaurant in Victor, ID called Grumpy's Goat Shack (for reasons that would make sense to my college clique but don't make sense to anyone else so I'm not going to elaborate) but they were closed for the season. Rude. Knowing that Victor was my last chance to get authentic Idaho potatoes in Idaho, I combed the streets for another option and found it. I got a grilled cheese because it was basically the only thing on the menu that was meat-free but the fries were really the main attraction here.

Tastes like potatoes and love.

Also, let's talk about dipping sauces. Ketchup has always been and continues to be my go to but recently, I have felt morally obligated to accept ranch dressing whenever it is offered (whether it is with fries or some other food group) because I know it was what Mandy would want, so I got ranch with my fries today. I did not, however, get "fry sauce." Everyone out here is crazy for fry sauce. They act like it's a big deal but it's mayo and ketchup. Like really people, it is not that big of a deal.

After that, I drove on the scenic Highway 33, which is apparently one of the most beautiful roads in America. I like to think of it as the craziest road I've ever driven while practicing my Oscar acceptance speech -- I'd like to thank the Academy for this award and for keeping me from driving off the road.

I'm staying at a hostel in Teton Village, WY, which is part of Jackson Hole but not actually Jackson (confusing, I know). Well, I got to the hostel before I could actually check in, so I went to Jackson itself to do some exploring. I have decided that Jackson is pretty much Banff but in Wyoming. I walked around and saw a lot of stuff (including some very tempting baked goods) and thought about how Wyoming will find any excuse to decorate with dead animals. I also saw an ice cream parlor where I could buy a gun. Thank goodness for Wyoming.

Being in a semi-civilized area again meant that I could enjoy one of my favorite things and go to the movies! I went to see The Scorch Trials, which stars Teen Wolf dream boat, Dylan O'Brien. That was basically the criteria I used to decide what movie to see... Despite the fact that the Maze Runner series is a personal favorite of two of my favorite people, I've never read the books, but I enjoyed the first movie and decided I would check out the sequel. What I really enjoyed were the pre-movie advertisements; you learn a lot about an area from what shows up before the movie begins and I learned a lot about Jackson/Jackson Hole -- some somewhat important stuff about their local banks and how to take care of your dog, but most importantly, I learned all about the movie Shane because that *surprise, surprise* classic Western was shot in Jackson Hole. How classic it actually is, I do not know, but I watched a lot of clips from it today.


I don't think that The Scorch Trials was a great film but I did have the entire theatre to myself and that was pretty great!

I'm now chilling in my hostel where I found out about a new website that's like Airbnb except it's free! People are just like yo, come stay on my couch and I'm like ok! Well, no, it isn't really like that but I'm still going to check it out.

Tomorrow the plan is to visit the National Elk Refuge but I keep getting conflicting reports on whether or not there will actually be any elk there so I guess we'll find out. (Also for anyone who might be confused, I mean "elk" like the horned, four legged animal and not "elf" like Orlando Bloom in a long blonde wig. I don't know where the nearest Elf Refuge is... Mandy).

Update on Satan

There were a few sarcastic comments that I left out of yesterday's blog post due to general exhaustion.

So, the most vile part of the Devil's Stairs was not the 90 degree incline. It was the 90 degree incline WHILE being totally convinced that I was going to be eaten at any moment. Do you know what happens when people tell you that you've significantly increased your chances of becoming a bear's next meal? Everything you see becomes a bear. EVERYTHING. I saw a cow and thought it was a bear. I saw a rock and thought it was a bear. A squirrel running across the trail... bear. A sparrow flying out of a bush... bear. My own footsteps... BEAR!

Luckily, I did not get eaten and can live on to be paranoid for another day. The end... or is it?

Let's Just Agree to Stop Naming Things After Satan

Hello from Idaho, or perhaps I should say Wyoming? I need to catch you all up on last night before I can move on to today's adventures. I am most definitely in Idaho, except Snapchat doesn't know that apparently. I picked up the geotag for Jackson Hole, Wyoming, which to be fair, is where I'm headed tomorrow and only a short hop across the border, but most definitely in another state.

Last night was also the crazy Supermoon that has taken over every social media outlet know to social media. I couldn't get any pictures of that (my camera is nice, but not that nice!) but I did get a picture of this great Idaho sunset before "the real show" began. Also, shout out to my friends and family who were all looking at the eclipse at the same time as me -- it means we were looking at the exact same thing at the same time and that we were all together in a way.

Pretty.

Now, on to today -- which started with disappointment. I had the brilliant idea that I would go to yoga this morning... except when I got to yoga, I was the only one there. No explanation, no yoga, no nothing. So I decided to walk around town.

I checked out the Geotourism Center, which was free! I learned that foxes aren't -- as they are portrayed on the internet -- just derping around when they dive face-first into the snow. They're actually hunting -- they can dive through three feet of snow just to catch a rat, but it only works if they're facing north. While I was at the Geotourism Center, I saw they had a stack of free postcards. Now, I love free stuff -- it's basically the reason I walked around the Geotourism Center -- and I love postcards but I was going to pass this one up until I realized that this was a postcard for the National Outdoor Leadership School in Lander, WY. Do I remember ever hearing about NOLS? No, I do not but I was in Lander two weeks ago, so it's pretty crazy that I would just happen to find a postcard that says Lander on it in Driggs, ID. I took the postcard. 

After walking around town, I went to go hiking. I'd been warned that it was bear season. Not as in the season when people can hunt bears but the season when bears hunt people. I guess this distracted me while I was driving because I. drove. up. the. wrong. mountain.

The view from the wrong mountain.

I get lost an awful lot. Glad to see I'm sticking with tradition. My host gave me a hand drawn map of how to get to her favorite trails (she suggested the one mile trail for me... more on that later) and I guess I didn't follow it properly because I quickly realized that I was not getting where I needed to get. I turned around and managed to find my way -- via four miles on a bumpy dirt road (that wasn't included on the map).

So, back to the bears. I had been told that I needed to buy bear spray. Later I was told that I didn't need to buy bear spray. The one thing that the townspeople (yes, they shall be known as townspeople because that is what you call people who offer you friendly advice in a town with only one stoplight) did agree on was that I should stick to one of the better traveled paths to avoid death by bear or moose or mountain lion but especially bear. This is how I ended up taking another trail and accidentally hiking seven more miles than I originally intended. Yes, I went on an eight mile hike.

Casual walk back.

I decided I would try Devil's Stairs. I don't know why I ever thought this was a good idea. We need to stop naming things after Satan! Like oh hey, nature AND HADES! You can say that I should have guessed this hike wasn't my best bet based on the name but there is also Devil's Food Cake and cake is the opposite of evil. Also, don't you think the Devil's Stairs should go down? I mean, Hell is supposedly beneath our feet but I can tell you that I was NOT walking in a southern direction! Not even close. The trail was supposedly 4.3 miles long and even with my saintly internal soundtrack of Climb Every Mountain on repeat, I turned around at 4 miles because when the last .3 miles are at a 90 degree angle, I value my sanity and my calves enough to turn around. So I guess that the devil got me, but I'd rather have the devil get me than a bear.

At the end of a long, yet relaxing day, I have decided that I am clearly Katniss Everdeen -- not only because I periodically do the Mockingjay whistle on hikes just in case -- but because in the books, the Capitol is in the Rocky Mountains and I'm currently in the Rocky Mountains, ergo SAT logic has taught us that I must be in the Capitol. You may call me Thomson Jaffe: The Girl In Sweatpants.

Peace and love, Idaho potatoes.

No, U-da-ho.

Ok, that blog title isn't exactly appropriate but it's funny. To me at the very least.

I am in the state of everyone's favorite starch -- the potato -- Idaho.

I am unbooked for the week and thought, well, I've never been to Idaho, so here I am.

On my drive here, I got to see a lot. One of my favorite parts was crossing the state border into Idaho -- just long enough to take the picture you see above -- before driving back into Wyoming to finally drive back into Idaho. Along with seeing a lot, I also got like 3/4th of the way through Gulliver's Travels, which I only started this morning -- I figured that a book about traveling was the way to go although I'm not sure how I feel about it.

During that mini-trip back into Wyoming, I drove through Afton, WY, which has the world's largest elk antler arch. I didn't know that was a thing. How could I have been so ignorant for all these years?! (But I did tell you that everyone in Wyoming uses antlers in all of their decorating a few days ago).

Once I got back in Idaho, I decided to stop and get some ice cream, but not just any ice cream. Rainey Creek's world famous square ice cream. Once again, how did I not know this was a thing? It is world famous, after all.

I am now chilling at the Airbnb bunk that I booked myself in Driggs, ID. It is my first time staying at an Airbnb which is kind of like a hostel/hotel situation except that it is someone's house. So it's a homestay that I'm paying for essentially. This one is definitely more like a hostel than others I've read about. I'm in a room with three bunk beds, although only one other bunk I've taken. I've seen others where it is legit just someone's extra room or even their couch. I don't think I'm desperate enough to ride a stranger's couch for $30 a night... yet. But this place seems totally fine.

Now, I have no idea what there is to do in Driggs. Like I said before, I basically came to Idaho for the novelty of coming to Idaho and this was the absolute cheapest place I could stay. I shall find out soon enough though because my belly is rumbling and I think it's nearly time to find some dinner -- probably potatoes.

I have been exposed to a hideous thing. All people who know the Biddle/Jaffe clan understand that the University of Michigan is the way to go. The grandparents went/met there. The parents went/met there. I would go there for grad school if they had something I wanted to study (Seriously? How does one of the most prestigious BFA programs in the country not have an equally prestigious MFA course of study? But I digress). University of Michigan means that Ohio State is bad. I learned this lesson around the same time that my father brainwashed me against coffee.

Well, this morning, I'm checking all my various social media accounts and bam! BETRAYAL! Whitney is visiting her boyfriend in Ohio and *gasp* found an Ohio State geotag. This is a heinous crime! How dare my eyes be exposed to something so indecent!

*Ends rant. Drops mic.*

Welcome to Lyman

The photo says it all. I've started my second residency of the fall in Lyman, WY, with two new partners and so far, things are swell (if not slightly boring -- no offense).

On the drive here, I stopped in Little America, WY, which wants to be like Wall Drug in South Dakota but isn't. They have a lot of billboards and 75 cent ice cream cones but nothing is quite like Wall Drug. The name "Little America" might have been the most interesting part about it for me. I got some gasoline and french fries and drove on.

We had auditions yesterday and I have nicknamed myself CinderTAD. Having two partners is strange because this is a two person job and it's Taylor Ann (always Taylor Ann, never just Taylor) and Kayla's first week as partners and their first week on Aladdin so it is way more important that they work on their partnership than getting along with me (we're all getting along though so no worries there) which means that I'm here to lend a helping hand in any way that I can but am letting them take the lead on most things. I'm also the one who is going to get dressed up at the end of the week because I'll be playing the Genie again, so CinderTAD is all in good fun.

 This morning I went on a walk to explore the town and just about walked it end to end. I didn't bring my fancy camera, but I was equipped with Snapchat, so I grabbed a pic. I'll probably go back out before I leave again (my walk lasted a whopping 45 minutes, so I think I can squeeze it in) to get some real pictures, but this is it for now.